Firstly Praise God for me being able to type out this note and thanks to all who have prayed for me, encouraged me, visited and called me during this time... I am a living testament to the mercies of God in my life.
For those who didn’t know, I met with an accident on Sept 29th, 2009 Tuesday night. Here is an account of what happened to me that night. I had a normal crazy day of work as usual, was gearing up for ARF camp on the 1st, so decided to give my bike for servicing. So around 9:00 pm met with the service guy at Delmiya Signal exchanged bikes. So I took his Activa so that I could reach home. Guys from the room called to order dinner and I recall giving the order too... So as I was heading back through the alley to get onto Bannerghetta road, reached near to the Matri apartments and the last I recall is a single headlight coming towards me from the opposite direction… After which I was blacked out. From the stories of my colleagues and from those who saw the bike… it looks like the person who hit me was drunk, he was on my side of the road and hit me on the left side which sends me towards the right. The helmet which I just saw since I am back at home now… was cracked with the left side visor broken. Some guy called Sahay( I think need to verify) used my phone to call my colleagues from the list. I think he called the ambulance too… and got me to the hospital too… After which my colleagues Mani, Suhas, Ranjith, Sreejesh, Rahul, Amit, and others dealt with everything from contacting my friends, dealing with the hospital process and insurance pre approval, getting the Activa and ensuring everything went smoothly. It seems the guys who brought me to the hospital seemed to be giving vague information’s like them putting my wallet in my laptop bag, but when checked wasn’t there… so my colleagues blocked my accounts and cards… but I hadn’t taken the cards to office but it’s good that they did that. In fact there was some talk on me being drunk and my colleagues knowing that I don’t drink figured there was some mishap. Also the guards who were closer to the accident said initially they gave the vehicle number to the people who got me there to the hospital. Anyways as you can see the stories are pretty vague and I didn’t follow it up since there wasn’t a case registered either. Lost my wallet with my DL and good amount of cash and some Dhiram in my secret compartment… one lesson learnt emergency cash should never be in the wallet. Glad I kept my cards separate.
I regained my consciousness while they were ripping my Jeans and T-Shirt out for undergoing some scans. I can recall much plus my right eye was swollen to the extent I couldn’t see much… Recall being x-rayed ct scanned and a bunch of other things. I saw a lot of familiar faces and I could recall all their names… Abru was with me walking beside me… saw a lot of my colleagues who turned up… saw my roomies too. Thank you all for being there… I guess I was too tired that I guess I got knocked out immediately. Joel stayed the first night with me…
Next day too I cant recall much that when I had my first operation, I am guessing then was given local anesthesia so don’t recall much… the next I can recall is being pushed on the bed out of the OT to the room and saw a lot of familiar faces… Remember Jerry was there… saw more of my colleagues and friends but I guess was too exhausted to know much what happened then.
Through it all just felt so helpless, that I just was thinking I am alive… These moments helped me realize that there’s a bigger purpose and the thing that I kept telling myself is that this pain that I am going through is nothing compared to what the Lord went through while he walked this earth… It gave me strength to press on…
My Roomies worked on getting my bike back and ended up paying over 6000Rs to the service centre guy for the Activa… nice eh…yeah Glad dad was around because my cards blocked, wallet lost not a good scenario.
I looked like a mess, I had a lot of scrapes on the right Face, right hand and right left have some photos I guess on the phone… My Dad and bro came on Oct 1st I am thinking or before not sure…since then Dad was staying with me… Had a lot of people come visit me and I am grateful for each one of you who took the time to come and see me…
Next couple of day was the camp and it was a blessed time for all there… they called from there to pray as well… anyways back in the room I was just coming to terms of what happened… There was peace knowing that God was in control and I was slowly recuperating… Even around this time I started having non-veg at the hospital… thanks for those who helped me sneak it in… as the hospital food wasn’t too much to my liking… sometimes it was nice but those who know my food taste would find it difficult for me… was put on a soft diet but I kind of made it normal… My appetite had reduced a lot too nearly down 50%. All this while till that weekend on Sat my bro had to head back to Chennai… I was on bed not able to move much… lying there got me to just be silent in his presence… those were moments of peace… recovery was getting better and by Sunday Oct 4th, I was like looking forward to getting out in a couple of days, back to my normal mode of talking… looking forward for going for the mission conference on Oct 16th… It was like things were getting back to normal. Doc GunaShekar had come to see the wound and seeing it he said there needs to be another operation to be done on the left leg and he scheduled the same for Oct 5th after lunch so that he could get a bigger OT( operation Theathre)
So what needed to be done was since I had a deep cut on my left leg that was switcher’d up, there was an area bigger than the size of my palm that was showing Dark color indicating that the area of skin wont survive. So the portion of skin needed to be taken from another part of my body. The options were, wrist, thigh or groin. The best option according to the doc was the wrist but that would leave a visible scar so he advised to opt for the Groin. So Groin it was… I didn’t think much besides the fact that I wanted to be done with it soon and be out of there…
During these times had a lot of people visit me and it felt nice knowing that there were so many who were concerned about me… Also the other thing was my bills were already around 1.5 L. Now that’s no small amount, I knew mine was covered by insurance but one of the things that went through my mind was the fact that how difficult it would be for a nominal person who isn’t covered by insurance from the company.
Doc had mentioned earlier it was going to be 5-6 hour operation as he needs to clean the wound get the skin from the groin. Stitch up the groin and then try getting the skin to work with the vessels in the blood of my left leg. So since I was in good spirits I was kind of not worked up but send out messages to all prayer partners and had a good response too…
Oct 5th Monday morning was a drag for it to get to afternoon… as it got closer felt a little unsure but put up a brave face… Sometime in the morning Cherry had called to say not to be discouraged…. I believe God goes ahead of you in your times of need and you will find that this was exactly what I would need soon….
Finally it came time for my second operation and as I was being realed to the OT, the thoughts I put in my mind was Jesus you suffered more, let me be able to get through this… as I was being prepped I enquired whether I would be out cold but it seemed they were planning for a spinal anesthesia… it felt kind of funny and painful at the same time when they inserted it into my spine… Weird feeling… anyways they put up a screen so that I wouldn’t see much… I was in the OT by 2:00 pm. I tried to sleep and I guess I was successful, when I was back up I could see the clock read 8:00pm, I did the math and I was thinking oh this is too long from then on I was conscious but no sensation spine below… I could feel things being done but no sensation as such… anyways I tried to look around. My arms were stretched out to both sides and I started feeling the stress and immediately my thoughts came to the cross and knew personally now it wasn’t easy for Christ to go through it… I kept looking at all the beeps and was a struggling a bit some with the stretched out hand and somehow indicated about it and they changed the position to place it on my chest… was a relief… time just kept going… I recall the docs playing music which wasn’t to my taste… seeing another reading paper… Began to wonder what’s happening… Was feeling so stressed having to be in the same position, Then Dr GunaShekar came besides me and asked if they could do a skin graft instead, me being in the plight said do whatever you think is necessary… By the time I was out of OT it was 2:00 am. 12 hrs in the theatre… not bad I thought… I knew many would have been there but since it was so late didn’t think anyone would have been there… by the time I was wheeled to my room it was 3:30 am… and I crashed almost instantly…
Ok prior to the operation the plan was to do a Flap reconstruction [FR] (I think it is called) and the Doc had said that the chances for a skin Graft to function well was near to impossible. The FR meant that you take skin with the fat and tissue and blood vessels from one area( right Groin for me) and try to place it over the wound linking the blood vessels together and get it to accept and fuse together. [all bits got from talking to the doc]. Anyways when they tried it initially there wasn’t proper flow of blood happening indicating that it would result in the skin growing dark and hence dead… The Doc and team tried about 4-5 times using different blood vessels too but in all cases the end result didn’t seem encouraging… which is when the Doc stepped and asked me if it was ok for the Skin Graft which he himself wasn’t so hopeful of the result.
So now you know what I mean when God plans ahead… Anyways Dad planned to leave after the operation back to Kerala to finish what he came here to do. Plus there were my roomies and friends who assured to be around to help out.
Oct 6th, this was one of worst days in the hospital. I had two tubes in me, one for the Urine and the other for the waste from the right Groin. The Urinal tract was on the left and the Waste collector on the right. I couldn’t move my left leg at all… felt numb and any slight movement would pull on the groin stitches… So think about being in the same state/position for the whole day, not a good feeling… I couldn’t move with the tubes in me and my right leg was more numb and immovable. Also could feel the pinch with the strain on the groin. Dad left and Tinu was staying that night. The urine which had collected in the urinal tract had a leak too. I had no clue what the stench was and don’t know how he survived that night… I was literally twitching with all the discomforts of the straight position and till date don’t know how I managed through it… In the morning they cleaned up the place and I still recall through the night asking to remove the tubes. The nurse that night checked with the doc and was instructed not to do anything that night…
I think in the morning or afternoon the Doc had come and said he was sorry that the operation didn’t go as planned and said he did all he could and this is when the discouragement was beginning to settle in … Though it hadn’t hit as such but I guess this was the root of it. At that time was just too tired to think I guess…This was when in the evening that Suja mamma {Philip Chayans Wife) from Kerala called me up. Now Suja mamma was going through a rough time with severe back pain and it was struggle on so many other fronts for them as a family. Anyways, she called me up to say NOT to be DISCOURAGED in any way at this time… It was as assurance in so many ways… Firstly to be encouraged by someone in their lowest estate and I praise God for that… 2nd Confirmation… when you think of what the future holds in store for you… not an easy time…
Oct 7th: This was definitely the first thoughts of discouragement started to sink in thinking about how the future is lined up for me and the possibilities of yet another operation in the back of your mind. Also the physical situations weren’t helpful but to feel so helpless… But Awesome are the ways of God to bring me the third encouragement in the midst of uncertainty… Josh had come to visit me. He spoke from Isaiah and a familiar passage on being renewed like the eagles… It was like bang on for me and I was overwhelmed in spirit and thought too. Our God is an Awesome God and that time spent to realize yet again that his presence was with me every second of the way was the feelings of Joy, Assurance, Peace & Strength in a whole different way…
During this time they removed both the tubes which gave me a world of relief. The Day before I also recall not being able to talk properly to John when he came to see me… sorry bro was in a total bad shape.
Oct 9th: visitation by the Doc wasn’t so assuring while he dressed the wound. It didn’t seem like it was making progress and that he wanted to see the dressing again in a couple of days before taking a decision.
Think it was this night that Bengy came over to stay and I got to watch Louis Giglio’s Indescribable tour the complete one this time… The thoughts that ran through my mind was A God so big would be concerned of someone so insignificant as me… That day I send out the message out to all prayer partners about trusting God in the healing than on the Doc. I felt the peace and assurance that His healing was happening… I was thinking what to say to the Doc when he comes to do the dressing again on the Monday Oct 12th. I felt the motions in my heart to tell Him I trust in a God who is capable of healing… [but I couldn’t make myself say it to him for some reason and I hope to in one of my following visits.]
During these times, I think I got my first Subway and KFC sneaked in. Also had porotta and chicken curry a lot friend brought fruits for me which helped though I had a stack by the time I left. Had good conversations with Bengy and Jerine when they stayed over, Discussed various issues and talked about a lot of things… some of the meaningful nights. I think it was during this time I got a passage from Psa 4 : 4 which says “In your anger do not sin, when you are on your beds, search your hearts and be silent” that spoke right out through to me at so many levels. Also at this time I kind of became clear about what exactly I wanted to do with respect to MBA… Came out clearly the area I want to see myself in the long run… It was an interesting observation actually
At the first dressing of the wound the doc was skeptical and he hinted for a 3rd operation. This is when I send out message to rally prayer support around the globe.
Oct 10th Second Dressing: While the doc undressed the wound he was most surprised to see the wound healing. His exact words were… “The graft is doing a lot better and looks like 60 % healing and there are pink areas which are good”. Praise God indeed for his healing hand. Nothing short of a miracle in my life . The Doc said he needed to check the dressing after 2 Days to give it the best chance. 2 days later on the 12th, He said it is way beyond him how it worked and also assured me at this time there would be no need for the 3rd operation... There is still a small area that still needs to show signs of healing but doesn’t warrant another operation. Praise God for his Goodness in my life. Our God is definitely the healer...
The bills mounted up to around 2.5 lakhs by this time and I do know it would have easily wiped me clean if I had to do it on my own. Again reminded of the many who would struggle in a similar situation and was greatful.
A lot of colleagues dropped by at various times and it was a pleasure to have your company… Ajay & Esha, Puneet & Reena, Srinivas, Hari, Suchi, Sunil, Madhu, Jobin, Jitesh, Nisha, Abitha, Sudeesh, Rishi, Prasad, Dhawal, Jubish, Siva Prasad, Raghavedra, Anvish, Ashu, Ramesh, Amit, Surej, Ranjit, Mani, Suhas, Sreejesh, KC, Amithab & wife( sorry don’t recall), Thank you all for taking time to come by… I hope I haven’t missed any [ will add as I recall].
A lot of people from Church, EU, Friends and Family had come and I am not naming all… but to each of you I have been blessed by your visit and words of encouragement.
Prior to the 2nd operation I pretty much got the physiotherapy lessons to walk using the crutches. But after the operation it took me a while to get back on the crutches… One incident I do recall while the Physiotherapist was giving me lessons for the exercises I couldn’t help laughing… Jerine was in the room so I told him I was thinking of Ansu giving the same explanations and both of us had a good laugh… Seriously appreciate a physiotherapist work just that the moment was a funny one
Oct 13: I got my first view of the sky on a wheelchair which felt good. Also I had my second round of KFC during this period. Had Grill Chicken and Chicken lollipops, Donuts from Donut Baker too, Beef and more porotta. Mystery mouse[somewhat similar to Strawberry Cheese cake if you only have the top bit] and a couple of strawberry milkshakes. Not a bad way to keep in sync with my food habits. Thanks to each one of you who helped make it possible. In fact also had someone offer to bring byriani but wasn’t so game for it. I had a lot of papaya this time around besides apples and oranges.
Another thing that happened during this time for those who don’t know, I got my hair shaved off thanks to Bengy, Jerine & Joel. So yeah I have joined the taklu head now. Got some pics on the phone too…
Tinu one of my rommies got to postpone his trip to Kerala twice thanks to the guys in the room. It helped me since he and joel along with Bengy and Jerine was able to take care of me. Tinu should be leaving to Dxb soon and I want to wish him the best while he goes there looking for a good job. Joel scored 930/1000 on his CCNA exams another example of Gods work in their lives. Bengy and Jerine Gods going to bless you both in the days to come and I am praying specifically for what we talked about.
Was expecting to get discharged on the next day but kind of delayed till the last dressing on Oct 14th. During wish the Doc again stated that it has done far better than he expected and really surprised that the skin graft worked. Ideally according to him this wasn’t the ideal way to do for the leg wound. Praise God indeed.
Oct 14: Discharge day. Well we got confirmation from the Doc by around 11:30 am but since it was an insurance thing, I got discharged by 7:00. Dad had his train around the same time. Joel helped me with all the bills and medicine gathering… Madhu, Pragathi, Jyothi & Sherwin helped me in processing it faster from the company side. Joel mentioned there was someone else in the hospital who was held back for over 24 hrs and he was furious with the hospital. Glad got mine done in the time frame I specified.
The ride on the cab was interesting and felt really good heading home. It was nice to be back home and sleep on my bed. Slept late and woke up at 12 so was in no mood to work. Had been walking a bit more at home for various things and was sitting on the company chair which my managers managed to send to my place. Its been tiring with slight pain but I am getting through… I am assured that he gives me the strength to go through. I spend most of today typing out this for recounting my experience.
I have been able to make a lot decisions during this time and helped me see many things which otherwise I would have missed out on... God is good and he doesn’t do anything which isn't within his plans.